


Rewritten

by Pinx_B (orphan_account)



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: Drama, F/F, Fluff, Future Fic, Light Angst, Romance, Yuri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-13
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-10-31 08:28:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10895526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Pinx_B
Summary: When the opportunity arises for Eli to be true to herself and Honoka, she wonders if it was too late and had she let happiness slip through her fingers several years ago...





	Rewritten

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Honoka was frozen in place, her blue eyes clashing with the lighter pair she was staring up at. Her thoughts were whirring around in her head with a mixture of gears that were not spinning together smoothly and it hurt her, it hurt her to try and see through Eli's words. _"She means that as friends, friends always say they love each other heh, yeah that's it. She already told me that once"._

But the way Eli was looking at her was not the way a friend would look, desire in her eyes with her heart on her sleeve which was all topped off with an adamant expression of a woman who knew what she wanted.

"Say something, please".

"I-I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting you to say... _that_ " Honoka replied after gulping.

The blonde scoffed and bit her lip, "That? You make it sound like an insult but I suppose that answers how you feel" she replied and forced a smile on her face, "That's okay, I understand".

"Don't be like that. I didn't mean it that way Eli-chan, I'm just surprised" Honoka explained whilst pulling Eli back to face her as she turned away, "It was sudden and I don't know what to say".

Eli steadied herself as she felt Honoka's touch on her bare arm and it sent chills down her spine despite the warm summer night's air that was lingering around Maki & Nico's home.

"You don't know?".

"I'm just confused".

Eli tilted her head to the side, "At what? I want to be with you, there is no hidden catch".

"It isn't that simple" Honoka answered with slight annoyance, "You can't say things like that so randomly".

"It is not random, believe me".

They were stood on the patio of one of the bedrooms that Eli had found herself in when she needed a breather. She wasn't expecting anyone to find her let alone Honoka.

"Honoka, do you feel the same about me?".

"Why are you telling me all this now is a better question" Honoka hit back with a bite that was normally never present in her tone.

Eli's gaze faltered, a hurt frown on her face, "Because I love you, isn't that enough? If it isn't mutual, then say so".

"Only on your terms you love me you mean" Honoka muttered and stepped back.

The blonde moved in front of her again, "Hey what's that supposed to mean?".

"Nothing. Look I just came here to make sure you are okay but obviously you have things to work through".

"Work through?" Eli repeated with exasperation and shook her head, "I tell you that I love you and you tell me that I have things to work through. Why are you being cold?".

Honoka squared up to the blonde, unable to keep her annoyance and anger in check at how quickly Eli forget that this exact situation is one that had happened two years ago. The hurt was as raw as the day it happened and Honoka could remember every word that Eli had uttered to her.

"What the matter, Eli-chan? Don't like the feeling of rejection?".

Eli was startled at the fire that had emerged from the woman's words.

"I..".

"It was so easy for you to brush away how I felt and clearly it was just as easy to forget it" Honoka scoffed, "Typical Eli-chan".

It clicked instantly as to what Honoka was referring to with that sentence alone and it wasn't that Eli forgot, she chose to conceal it away, opting to never speak of it for the sake of their friendship.

"Honoka, that was..different, I was different".

"Please, save the excuses because they were pathetic back then and they probably are now".

"That's out of line and you know it" Eli replied, her voice raising, "I did that for our sake!"

"Bullshit!" Honoka seethed, "It was about you and covering your own back and you know, I was fine with that, I got it but don't you dare say it was for us. We could've happened back then but you..you were so sure that what I felt was a phase, that it was one sided".

"It wasn't meant to be like that Honoka, please listen to me!".

"You don't get to be angry at me!" Honoka yelled and poked Eli's chest, " _You_ turned _me_ down remember? You are the one that said you didn't feel the same so don't even dare to make it out like I'm the ba-".

Eli grabbed Honoka by the waist and pressed her lips against hers in a kiss that made both of them waver with pent of energy, anger and emotion. Honoka tugged a fistful of the blonde's jacket and tried to shove her away weakly, not wanting to give into the very thing she had wanted to do for so long but she couldn't bring herself to actually shove Eli away. It felt like her mouth was soothing away the frustration she had felt and buried when Eli denied her feelings, in a way that couldn't be put into words so Honoka allowed it all in.

"I can't explain how much I regret doing that to you, Honoka. It was a lie" Eli gasped out in one go when they pulled apart, "I lied about not feeling the same because I was a coward, a damn coward who wasn't willing to take a chance".

"Eli-chan...".

Placing her hand on Honoka's heated neck and her other hand still tight around her waist, Eli continued, "Everyday I have torn myself apart at that mistake, going over and over it wishing there was a way to undo it. I thought you would walk away from me that day and that I would never see you again which I would've deserved yet you still were willing to see me after, even as friends.." Eli trailed off as Honoka's grip loosened and her hands held the bottom of her jacket, "And every time we met and talked, I was a hair away from telling you how I felt but I'd already lost my chance".

"Why did you deny it?" Honoka accused as her tears welled up at hearing Eli's words.

"Because I was an idiot. Because I was afraid. Because I thought you'd reject me over Tsubasa. Because I'd rather have you in my life as a friend even if we amounted to nothing more. Because I thought I would screw things up if I told you the same. Because I...I can't bear the thought of hurting you further".

"You really are an idiot you know that?".

"Honoka?".

The shorter woman had pulled Eli into a hug with her arms around her waist and head on her chest, a small laugh escaping at the incredulous situation.

"For someone who is all about being straight forward about things you are terrible at saying it like it is. I thought you got past that when we met but clearly I was wrong. You should've just told me how you felt!" she breathed out as Eli placed her arms behind her head, "You say you didn't want to hurt me but you already did that when you said you didn't feel the same, you couldn't have taken a risk and said you felt the same instead of denying me flatly? I think I know which one I would have preferred to feel pain over, you idiot".

"I..I'm sorry" Eli stammered as the realisation hit her that Honoka was right in a sense, "I guess it truly falls on the fact that I was a coward. I'm so sorry, Honoka".

Honoka moved back slowly and let go of Eli as she wiped her eyes, "You broke me that day you know. I don't think I've felt something that hurt as bad and you know I've bumped into a lot of things in my life but you..you saying that it was better to be friends killed me" the woman explained and held Eli's apologetic gaze, "I never got over that but like you, I was willing to bury what I felt just to see you still. That was enough for me if that was all I got, I love you that much but now, what does it matter".

"Don't say that" Eli pleaded and tried to hold Honoka's hand again but she stepped back, "Please, give me a chance to make up for letting you go and hurting you. Let me show you how much I love you, I know you have every reason to say no but please Honoka, allow me to make up for my stupid mistake".

Honoka lowered her eyes fearing that she would give in and she wanted to, she wanted to run back into the blonde's arms and kiss her till they both couldn't breath and continue kissing her till suffocation threatened to take over but the side of her that still stung from Eli's rejection won out and she walked past her.

But Eli was faster and pressed against her back, her arms encircling her waist and face buried in her shoulder.

"Let me go".

"I can't do that".

The irony of that sentence felt bitter in Eli's mouth and hilarious in Honoka's ears

"Eli-chan, let me go".

Her body limped as if all her bones had melted along with the muscle causing her to back into Eli's chest, her legs refusing to move. All Honoka had yearned for was holding her with a heavy heart and words that bled guilt and regret.

"I cannot do that. I know I messed up on a colossal scale that day and I swear I'll spend the rest of my life amending it, because I love you and I do not want to spend another moment pretending that I don't" the blonde whispered and hugged her tighter, "I'm so sorry, Honoka".

She could again easily walk away from Eli just like that but Honoka knew it would haunt her forever. Not only not giving Eli a chance but choosing to never see her again. Eli wasn't the type of woman to say what she was saying so carelessly, especially not towards opening her heart like she was doing and knowing that was keeping Honoka locked in her heartache of an embrace.

"Please don't make the same mistake as I did, you know I'm what you want just like I have always known that it is you I need".

She was right Honoka thought, what good would it do to throw away something that could be so beautiful over a past incident, as painful as it was. Eli was determined for a chance to make it right and doing what she could to ensure that, Honoka figured meeting her halfway would be a good start as they both wanted the same thing indeed.

Honoka turned in Eli's arms, the air between them heavy with a myriad of feelings but one that was prevalent.

The blonde was crying too and Honoka's eyes widened for a moment before she placed her thumb under the bottom eyelid and wiped at the stray teardrop that threaten to fall down the fair cheek. It wasn't often that Eli cried, not unless she was truly hurting, that much she knew.

"Promise me something..".

"Anything".

A smile braced the shorter woman's lips and Eli was sure her soul dropped out of her body.

"That you won't hide how you feel. Not just with me but other things too, Eli-chan. There is no harm and wrong in showing how you feel. I have known you for so long and you are far from a coward", she stopped and thought for a second, "Okay maybe just a bit but not the point" Honoka teased as Eli shook her head and brushed her hair with her fingers, "But really, I need to know you won't hesitate like that with me, not now".

"I promise" Eli replied instantly, "A lot has changed. That's why I felt daring enough to let you know that I love you so very much. I have a lot to make up for and believe me not a day will pass that that I won't show you that you mean everything to me. I swear it on my life".

Honoka blushed at the sheer intensity of Eli's unwavering and determined voice as she declared that. She felt her body flush at the powerful tone of it, each word accentuated by the contrasting soft look of Eli's glistening blue eyes on her.

"Well, that's definitely a good start" Honoka breathed out as she kissed the blonde, her hands resting on her shoulders now as their lips moved in a floating pace against each other's.

 

Eli moaned gently into Honoka's lips, the feeling of obvious reciprocity in this one making it all the more knee weakening. She placed her hands on the woman's hips and squeezed softly and Honoka reacted by pushing up against her as Eli's tongue tasted her mouth.

Not really caring that the others might send a search party out to locate them soon, the duo continued the steady cadence of their deepening kiss with Eli pulling them till the back of the bed hit her legs and she hoisted Honoka onto it, the woman's knees on either side of her lap.

Hands were roaming everywhere in a way that would make one think that touching could count as love making fully with the way they were touching each other. Eli's warm hands skimmed down Honoka's skirt clad thighs before moving them back up and resting them there whilst Honoka had yanked off the blonde's jacket and was trailing a hand down her neck, the other clawing lightly down her arm.

The feeling of Eli's lips traversing down her throat got Honoka to regain her sense a little only to lose them again when the warm tip of her tongue pressed against it. She bit down on her lip and lurched forward, not that it did much as the small lick travelled down the length of her throat.

Eli was too far gone in the intoxicating feeling and taste that Honoka exuded, the hot body pressed against her chest and her arms around tight keeping her still. Small whimpers and low groans of her name danced around the air in perfect harmony with the other sounds that Honoka was making.

But somehow, she managed to get her mind back though her love and lust for the woman on top of her was pulsating at the same pace her heart was. She closed her mouth and kissed Honoka's neck once more before moving her face up to see the darkened and sensual blue eyes looking at her.

Honoka placed her fingertips on the woman's lips and just took in the sight of a messy and fired up Eli whilst wondering how anyone could be perfect in any situation but then she thought, _"That's Eli-chan for you"._

"As much as I want to continue discovering which parts of your body make you move and sound like that, I'd rather not risk Nico and Rin knocking through the door just for laughs" Eli smiled and felt drowsy due to the way Honoka was stroking her cheeks and lips.

Honoka giggled and kissed the blonde lightly, "Or Nozomi-chan" she said which made the blonde chuckle even more as they'd never hear the end of it

 

As luck would have it, the door did open to reveal a head shaking, hands folded across her chest & disapproving Umi saying, "Shameless" with Kotori behind her, an apologetic smile on her face.

The duo grinned at each other at the actual person to find them but they were okay with that. They were okay with whatever happened now, the worst and almost soul slipping scenario between them had been averted.

It didn't matter if the world saw them being in love with each other, it didn't matter who else knew their story or history because at the end of the day, the voice that mattered was the one that would write the book of the rest of your lives with you.  
  
  


 


End file.
